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Last week, my husband and I had the opportunity to see a band that is close to our hearts. A band that we just happened to discover in 2015, a few weeks after losing baby Micah. My husband had noticed that The Wailin’ Jennys were playing at a nearby venue on his birthday, so despite not knowing anything about this band we decided to go to the show. It was the first time we had ever gotten a babysitter for our daughter, who was 3 at the time. We were in desperate need of an escape from reality and a night out was the best we could do. That night is not only one of few good memories from that year, but it is one of the only memories I have from that year, with other memories of events and occasions being lost somewhere in the fog of grief.
We went out for dinner that night and then headed to see this band we had never heard of. And it turned out these ladies were just what I needed. There was a dark and desperate beauty in their songs, with three lovely voices singing. Many of the songs were about death, grief, and being brokenhearted – things I could certainly relate to. It was very therapeutic for me, my feelings being spoken through song, by people who I assumed were no stranger to pain either. I had tears in my eyes nearly the whole time. In the midst of grief and defeat, I was energized not only by a night out, but by music and words that seemed to speak to my soul. I immediately bought all of their albums and wondered when they would return.
Fast forward to two months ago, when I saw that The Wailin’ Jennys would again be in town, at the same venue as before. I wanted so badly to go, almost as a way to celebrate how far we had come out of the valley of grief. And although we didn’t have a babysitter, I decided to buy tickets and figure out the babysitter issue later. But, it turned out that the show was sold out and I thought it just wasn’t meant to be.
Then just a week before the show, I received an email informing me that another show had been added. My attempt at getting a babysitter failed, so once again I figured it just wasn’t meant to happen. But two days later, I was surprised with a text from a former babysitter letting me know that she would be in town for Thanksgiving break in case I needed someone to watch the kids. It was then that I knew God’s hand was in this, taking care of the details Himself. So I scheduled the babysitter and bought the tickets.
And off we went. The same band. The same venue. Two years later. It was a celebration of sorts. A celebration of what our lives look like now compared to two years ago. We had made it through the valley of loss, seemingly stronger than ever. And while not complete, our family had added another baby to the mix. While I could still relate to the songs about death and grief, it felt good that these issues were a bit further from my heart than they were two years ago. Again I felt refreshed. Renewed.
It was an evening of beautiful music that truly speaks to me. This is our band. It’s as if their music has provided the soundtrack for at least a portion of our lives. That night two years ago was our first step in starting to live again after we had lost our baby. It was a night that was born out of sadness. But this time it was out of celebration.
(This post contains affiliate links, meaning I will make a small commission if you click through and make a purchase.)
If you are interested in experiencing music by The Wailin’ Jennys, click here
to check out their latest album, which I just bought after the show last week (I couldn’t resist – it was amazing!) I love it and am sure you will too!
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